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Yeah, that sucked.


K.C.

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I had a houseful for Christmas.. . . so many that I escaped to the computer room and locked the door. Family is nice and all, but too much is too much. My aunt and uncle came in town. They are staunch republicans from Illinois, and while I don't hold that against them they do not like the gay folks. I opened my home to them thinking they would be respectful to me, my children, and everyone else. I was wrong. I was treated disrespectfully on numerous occasions and in front of others. My kids were called bastard children and I was accused of populating the world with maladjusted children. While I do not mind others to have an opinion about certain aspects of our society, I do find that attacking those who have opened up your home is not nice. It occurred to me that people who believe that their opinions are more important than another's feelings are those who take freedom away from the citizens in this country. As I have stewed about this, I have learned that I, too, oppress people with my opinions and my new year's goal for 2008 is to work to accept people for who they are, and what they believe. As for my aunt and uncle, I politely asked them to stay in a hotel and not return for dinner or gift exchange if they felt that "fags" like me should be sent off to seminaries where we should be reprogrammed to be sexually correct. It's the first time I've ever asked a family member to leave my home.

I just thought would share my Christmas with you. I hope everyone here had a merrier Christmas than I.

Here's to a great New Year.

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Wow, I'm really sorry. Some people.. I just don't get them. I could never completely insult someone inside someone else's house, let alone their own if they opened it up to me. That's just terrible.

Cheer up, bud. You know who your real family and friends are. :smilewide:

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That baffles me. Why accept your invitation and then blatantly disrespect you in your own home and in front of family? If they couldn't control and withhold their personal feelings over your lifestyle, they should have politely declined your invitation and made other plans.

Sorry to hear this. But still, Merry Christmas to you and your family. :)

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You did the 'right' thing. Sometimes you can educate people and sometimed you can't. People in both the extreme Left and the extreme Right need to learn to just get along.

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Well back in my day if we found out a guy had a bad case of fairy we'd send him off to war; it straightened 'em right out! :P

But seriously, that's f@#ked up. I mean to be honest I'd say almost all of my beliefs would probably align with the relatives in question, but my whole take on the gay issue is that as long as the person is a good, decent, productive, contributing member of society then their lifestyle choice is of no concern to me.

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You did the right thing. It is appalling they treated you in that fashion. And to call the kids bastards? Those people have no understanding of what it is to be human and to be compassionate and respectful of others. To stoop to their level and involve kids much less in the bashing is unconscionable.

You should be proud you stood up for yourself. I raise my glass to that. Stand proud, man.

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I am not trying to make light of the events that transpired in your household over Christmas, but I do have to ask, were they drunk (loaded, high, stoned)? How defective must someone’s state of mind be to accept an invitation, travel to another person’s house (during a holiday) and then proceed to act like such interminable pricks?

As a centrist conservative, stories like this make me really angry. These Bush humping, neo-Christian ultra-right morons have all but destroyed conservatism in this country. Simply disgraceful.

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Thanks for the support guys.

Makfu, no they weren't drunk. They are just loud mouths. I have taken some flack from my mother for asking them to leave, but she didn't see all of what was transpiring.

I believe in "live and let live", and who do people think they are when they place their opinion over the feelings and respect of other human beings?

By the way Makfu, sometime in 2008 I will be ordering a new CTS 3.6DI with 6-speed. I'm curious to know how things are going with yours.

Edited by K.C.
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Thanks for the support guys.

Makfu, no they weren't drunk. They are just loud mouths. I have taken some flack from my mother for asking them to leave, but she didn't see all of what was transpiring.

I believe in "live and let live", and who do people think they are when they place their opinion over the feelings and respect of other human beings?

By the way Makfu, sometime in 2008 I will be ordering a new CTS 3.6DI with 6-speed. I'm curious to know how things are going with yours.

Wow, that is just incredible that they behaved so badly when they were straight up sober. That requires a remarkable level of selfishness that, frankly, I can’t say I have ever witnessed firsthand. Don’t get me wrong, my family is full of poorly behaved individuals, but what you describe is pretty astounding. Frankly, you did the right thing – there is just no excuse for that kind of behavior.

As for my CTS, I have to say that I adore the car. I haven’t be this smitten with an automobile since the E39 540i. There are a couple of things you should know though:

1. The Asin manual is not the perfect synergistic engine-transmission combo that the 6L50-E is. I assume, because of emissions management be forced upon engine management alone, there is more induction noise at lower-mid-revs (this is the distant whooshing NVH Car & Driver noted). Doesn’t bother me, but it might bug some.

2. While I think the shift action is very good, the clutch is a tad heavy and has VERY abrupt engagement that tends to make me think the engineers listened a little too closely to the professional track drivers. That said, pedal placement is perfect for heel-toe and the quick clutch really rewards proper rev-matching. Just keep this in mind because, while it didn’t bother me, my friend had a hard time adapting to the clutch because he was used to the ultra-light and very forgiving clutch in his Audi.

I would recommend test driving a manual transmission car (if you can find one) before you buy it, to make sure you like the setup. Personally, I wouldn’t have it any other way as it lets you really work the top-end of the 3.6DI motor which is just glorious. There is also something just plain cool about a manual shifter in a fully optioned Cadillac – it makes more of a statement about your taste in cars than any aftermarket effects kit or rims. However, it is definitely not for everyone.

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That sucks man, sorry to hear it.

It seems from your posts that you're one of the nicest guys here, so I couldn't imagine anyone blatantly disrespecting you in the first place. But for them to come into your house and act that way is just unbelievable.

Meh, if it makes you feel any better I had a lot to look forward to this year as well. What, between my bouts with depression, the constant flow of alcohol and meth on one side of the family and the other side thinking they're better than you and absolutely too good to associate with you; the holidays were, at best, exhausting.

[/Dr. Cox Rant]

Edited by FUTURE_OF_GM
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I’m sorry to hear that, K.C. Them being rude to you anywhere is inexcusable.

Over the past year and a half or so, I’ve learned the hard way that family can be an amazing thing, but it can also be a cause for tremendous turmoil and a breeding ground for hate.

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Thanks everyone for the support.

FOG man, I have dealt with the depression $h!. I have cured myself from it. If you want to know more about what I did to get rid of it, then PM me and I'll give you the details of what I did. If it helped me, it may help you. Everyone is different, though, and you have to find what works for you. I don't trust those chemical medications that are given to people by doctors. Oh, and FOG, I'd be getting the hell away from the alcohol and meth people in your life. You're too good for that man. Your success is dictated by the people you surround yourself with and you gotta dump the human barnicals before they drag you down. You're too smart of a guy for that.

As for putting up with the stupid $h! and ignorance at my place for the holidays, I can only say that I learned how to stick up for myself in a more effective way other than what I wanted to do/say to them. I think its best to let people like that go on and do their stupid $h! because they only make themselves look like asses, and they'll suffer for it eventually. It's fun to keep your enemies close so you can watch them suffer from their own moronics.

Makfu: Thanks for the tip on the CTS 6MT. I like a car with an edge. From how it sounds, I bet this car would be a good fit for me. I'll keep you updated.

I will head over to the Cadillac dealer in St. Charles, IL tomorrow to see if they have a CTS 6 in stock. I am visiting the family farm in northern IL for a few days to relax a bit after the fiasco I just survived. I will let everyone know what I think if they do have one in stock.

On a side note, I went to Bingo tonight at the Lions Club here in Elburn, IL and noticed that Bob Jass (I call it Hugh Jass Motors) has two 08 Malibus. One is a red LT1 4 cylinder, the other a white LTZ V-6. Even with 3 inches of snow on them, they look much more expensive than they are and they have real road presence. I also noticed that Hugh Jass left his Corvettes out in the snow. Stupid stupid! Its a sin to disrespect Corvettes that way. Bad Hugh Jass! BAD! :P

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Thanks everyone for the support.

FOG man, I have dealt with the depression $h!. I have cured myself from it. If you want to know more about what I did to get rid of it, then PM me and I'll give you the details of what I did. If it helped me, it may help you. Everyone is different, though, and you have to find what works for you. I don't trust those chemical medications that are given to people by doctors. Oh, and FOG, I'd be getting the hell away from the alcohol and meth people in your life. You're too good for that man. Your success is dictated by the people you surround yourself with and you gotta dump the human barnicals before they drag you down. You're too smart of a guy for that.

As for putting up with the stupid $h! and ignorance at my place for the holidays, I can only say that I learned how to stick up for myself in a more effective way other than what I wanted to do/say to them. I think its best to let people like that go on and do their stupid $h! because they only make themselves look like asses, and they'll suffer for it eventually. It's fun to keep your enemies close so you can watch them suffer from their own moronics.

Makfu: Thanks for the tip on the CTS 6MT. I like a car with an edge. From how it sounds, I bet this car would be a good fit for me. I'll keep you updated.

I will head over to the Cadillac dealer in St. Charles, IL tomorrow to see if they have a CTS 6 in stock. I am visiting the family farm in northern IL for a few days to relax a bit after the fiasco I just survived. I will let everyone know what I think if they do have one in stock.

On a side note, I went to Bingo tonight at the Lions Club here in Elburn, IL and noticed that Bob Jass (I call it Hugh Jass Motors) has two 08 Malibus. One is a red LT1 4 cylinder, the other a white LTZ V-6. Even with 3 inches of snow on them, they look much more expensive than they are and they have real road presence. I also noticed that Hugh Jass left his Corvettes out in the snow. Stupid stupid! Its a sin to disrespect Corvettes that way. Bad Hugh Jass! BAD! :P

I am jealous, I have to wait until 2010 for my CTS. It seems my lovely wife wants a new SUV in 2008.

K.C. just stick to your friends and family that bring happiness into your life and screw the rest! :AH-HA_wink:

Edited by Pontiac Custom-S
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K.C., I'm sorry that you're family members were rude to you and your children this past Christmas. There is no excuse for anyone acting that way at any time fo the year. At least you know how they are, and the other family members present at the time do to, and it gives you a reason not to invite them back ever again. I am heterosexual, but I am an open-minded person and as long as a person doesn't push any of their agenda/issues onto me, I'll get along fine with them. I'm told by many of the people I work with & for that is what makes me to be one of the better teachers where I teach at (all students are welcome in my classroom).

To make you feel better, I'll arrange this to show up in your driveway soon:

2008_cadillac_cts.jpg

(btw, I still haven't received the red Sierra you sent me for my birthday!!!)

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PCS, thanks bud.

GMTG, I'm sorry for the delay with your Sierra, but you didn't want the red one so I had to reorder it. :P

As for the family, things have settled down because they know that I stand up for what I believe in. The golden rule goes a long way, and it is a double edged sword. If I acted like that, I would expect to be treated the same way.

Thanks for the CTS! I went to the Cadillac dealer in St. Charles, Illinois and they did not have one 6MT CTS. They did have a bunch of CTS 4s though. I did not drive one. The dealer was really nice, though. I kept eyeing this STS DI3.6, but it does not come with a 6MT. :(

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As a gay man whose extended family consists of conservative evangelists from Mississippi and almost too moderate for comfort farmers from Iowa, I can understand where you are coming from. I'm not quite sure what is worse-getting hateful looks and random disrespectful side comments from my neo-con relatives, or all of my moderate relatives who just are not willing to recognize it's existence. Sometimes I get more frustrated with the silence honestly. It is much easier to respond to anger with strength than it is to respond to those who are just uncomfortable... Luckily for me my immediate family is very very open, so much so that my mom often says, "thank god I was blessed with a gay son who could buy me decent Christmas gifts I'll actually USE!"

I am proud of you for responding so well with your relatives. It takes a lot more strength than many would think to hold your ground like that-especially when it could risk alienating your other relatives. It shows wisdom for you to not allow your children to face that kind of ignorance in your home. ;-)

-J

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As a gay man whose extended family consists of conservative evangelists from Mississippi and almost too moderate for comfort farmers from Iowa, I can understand where you are coming from. I'm not quite sure what is worse-getting hateful looks and random disrespectful side comments from my neo-con relatives, or all of my moderate relatives who just are not willing to recognize it's existence. Sometimes I get more frustrated with the silence honestly. It is much easier to respond to anger with strength than it is to respond to those who are just uncomfortable... Luckily for me my immediate family is very very open, so much so that my mom often says, "thank god I was blessed with a gay son who could buy me decent Christmas gifts I'll actually USE!"

I am proud of you for responding so well with your relatives. It takes a lot more strength than many would think to hold your ground like that-especially when it could risk alienating your other relatives. It shows wisdom for you to not allow your children to face that kind of ignorance in your home. ;-)

-J

Nothing like a practical mother! My father made Archie Bunker look like a liberal, but even he eventually came around. My entire family (thanks to my mother, who puts Reuters to shame) have known I am gay since I was 15. The only person who never got used to it was my maternal grandmother, and she was the original Battleaxe anyway, so no great loss there. My current partner was raised Jehovahs Witness in Brazil, of all places - and even his family makes up the spare room for us when we visit. I don't understand much of what they say to me, but at the airport his mother cries a lot and hugged both of us to her side and insisted on group shots of the 3 of us.

In my experience, the only people who don't 'get it' are either hopelessly blinded by their beliefs, closet cases, or people who have sexual dysfunctions of their own so that your sexuality makes them uncomfortable. I am not being mean, just honest. If you dig deep into these people's pasts you will often find sexual skeletons that make them lash out at you.

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Nothing like a practical mother! My father made Archie Bunker look like a liberal, but even he eventually came around. My entire family (thanks to my mother, who puts Reuters to shame) have known I am gay since I was 15. The only person who never got used to it was my maternal grandmother, and she was the original Battleaxe anyway, so no great loss there. My current partner was raised Jehovahs Witness in Brazil, of all places - and even his family makes up the spare room for us when we visit. I don't understand much of what they say to me, but at the airport his mother cries a lot and hugged both of us to her side and insisted on group shots of the 3 of us.

In my experience, the only people who don't 'get it' are either hopelessly blinded by their beliefs, closet cases, or people who have sexual dysfunctions of their own so that your sexuality makes them uncomfortable. I am not being mean, just honest. If you dig deep into these people's pasts you will often find sexual skeletons that make them lash out at you.

What irks me is their preoccupation with the sex part. It's MUCH more than that. It's about world domination...errr...It's about who you fall in love with, building relationships, etc. Anyway, I haven't seen the inside of a closet since I was 13, though I often miss it. It was quite cozy. I had a fireplace and everything!

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My closet was full of Hot Wheels, Big Bruiser, and model cars...no room for me EVUH. Had a crush on my best friend in kindergarten, so I was one even before I knew there was a name for it.

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