One fine day, I go onto the MSN search engine and type in "2005 Buick LaCrosse", desperately craving information on the Buick Regal replacement. Then, I find "The Lounge..." hey, there's intelligent life here.
And, looky here, posts like the one above are the order of the day ...Paolino's emotionally charged posts about his foibles delivered with the inimitable NY Italian/Jewish vibe that sitcoms are made of and more stories of our little Ocnblu scampering off to the Maryland shore and "the" campground to drop his shorts. Love you guys...one of a kind. When Paulie or Ocn do a thread on anything remotely connected with sexuality, they are among the best attended so now there's enough critical mass to add my :twocents:
People should pick friends based on what they add to your life. Ideally, one would not have to even address this in terms of percentages or categorization. I have 3 requirements for my friends:
1. Intelligent
2. Fun or funny
3. Put up with my irreverence, sarcasm and caustic sense of humor.
I have friends ALL over the checkerboard. Most noticeable is how many FOREIGN friends I have. I'm "the welcome wagon," I'm told. I have had 1.5 friends that were gay. Past tense. No longer friends but NOT because of their sexuality.
Friend 1:
I grew up with him and his siblings. They were Italian and had kids the same ages as our family's kids. Went to the same grade in Catholic school in LA and were in the Boy Scouts together. He was hysterically funny...we toilet papered a lot of houses together. When he went off to community college, he became really flamboyant and started hanging out in West Hollywood. I went to a 4-year college and got real serious about my studies. We lost touch. As I moved away from So Cal, I actually wanted to reconnect will all of my friends to feel connected to my place of birth. So, I reconnected with this one friend as well. I found him irritating and the drugs and depression had put his life in the toilet. I will confess that, at a certain point, I was using him for lodging. He had moved to Long Beach in the middle of "the ghetto" which makes for a quick jaunt to either LA or OC. I figured "buy him some ham and eggs at the Park Pantry in the morning and crash on his couch for a couple of nights" ...and I could save some money! To show you how "off" he was, I was instructed to close the lid on the toilet seat so his cats couldn't drink. Oh brother. I forgot to do this. He went off like a deranged individual and was fuming as I left for the airport. Haven't looked him up since. But this has also happened with other friends in SoCal....male/female, straight/gay, married/single, white/other...having grown up together in SoCal was no longer a valid reason to remain friends. This has been sad for me.
Friend .5 (half a friend):
I am living in suburban Seattle at the time and my phone rings. One of my grad school friends (nice guy and funny too, he was in quite a few of my classes) is on the line: "Hey, guess what Bob, I just accepted a position with a Seattle firm." So, he's now living in the Pacific Northwest. He would call and we would periodically go for coffee or something to eat. He took up residence in Seattle proper, found his circle of gay friends and I never heard from him again. I bought a townhome, as did he. I remember "You have to come see the place I bought" and ditto on my end. To this day, I've never seen his place and when I go through Seattle, I don't even bother to look him up.
Comments on some above observations and remarks:
-a couple of you (Paolo and tmp) talk about your female friends. Are the straight people you hang out with mostly women? If so, drop their asses and thin those ranks. I'm sorry, but how can being friends primarily with women reinforce your masculinity? A few is ok, if you are going to school or work with them. I think I would find it offensive if some chick were to use me as a sounding board for her guy problems or baby problems. That's a form of "castration" and you don't need it.
- oh yeah, one more thing. TJ from Costa Mesa said he worked with a couple of co-workers who said they were "married" -- in quotes. The one I find a head scratcher is "dating." How do two masculine, self-sufficient guys theoretically "date" each other? Does the one receiving the invitation "bat" his eyelashes and coyly say "Gee, I don't know...oh...well, ok." This I don't get. How do 2 "predatory" animals (males) or 2 "nesting" animals (females) "date" ? Pardon my narrowmindedness on this one.
