Sign in to follow this  
Followers 0
cmattson

Floridians

18 posts in this topic

Ok, I'm at a software conference/convention over at Disney's contemporary resort. A few questions for your native Floridians (I know a couple of you are from here): 1) What's with the flipping humidity? 2 seconds outside and you think to yourself: dang, I should've put deoderant on my balls. 2) What's with the STUPID "ApplianceDirect" commercials? They are about 15 minutes long, they've got some wacko pseudo-homely chick and some crazy guy talking non-stop -- and they alternate yelling "ApplianceDirect!". I stumbled upon it the first night I was here (Sat) and I (unfortunately for me) couldn't stop watching it: it was a train wreck. 3) We had a nice rainstorm here Sat night. I couldn't believe how many accidents I saw. There was one really flipping cool one with a pickup truck and a LARGE flatbed trailer. The trailer sideswiped the car (a Camry -haha!) and the car flew off into the ditch. The truck driver over compensated and spun the whole thing into circles. He went around 2 1/2 times before he ended up in the ditch -- and he was FLYING when it happened. I wish I had it on video -- it was a wild sight. The question is: WTF is with these people? Doesn't anybody know how to drive in the rain?!? Or did I some see some quirk of humanity in my 20 minutes of driving? Edited by cmattson
0

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

We had a nice rainstorm here Sat night.  I couldn't believe how many accidents I saw.  There was one really flipping cool one with a pickup truck and a LARGE flatbed trailer.  The trailer sideswiped the car (a Camry -haha!) and the car flew off into the ditch.  The truck driver over compensated and spun the whole thing into circles.  He went around 2 1/2 times before he ended up in the ditch -- and he was FLYING when it happened.  I wish I had it on video -- it was a wild sight.  The question is:  WTF is with these people?  Doesn't anybody know how to drive in the rain?!?  Or did I some see some quirk of humanity in my 20 minutes of driving?

[post="1933"]<{POST_SNAPBACK}>[/post]


Considering that Florida is probably the rainiest state in America (where do you think that humidity comes from?), I find that very amusing. You'd think that, with all the rain there, people would've figured out how to drive in the rain by now. Of course, the large population of geriatrics could have something to do with the level of driver incompetance...

Paging Dr. Flybrian... The C&G Lounge is looking for Dr. Fly...

...Would Jack Woodcock please report to the pump division immediately! Jack Woodcock to the pump division...
0

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Yes..humid and lots of rain...and hurricanes and other extreme weather. I lived in Florida 6 years, in Marathon in the Keys...it was fun living on the ocean, but I don't miss the humidity... My home state for the last 8 years is quite the opposite in climate---very dry and low humidity here in Colorado, w/ lots of sun..
0

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Fly is probably more qualified to answer your questions, but I have one.. Guys really put deodorant under their balls???????????????
0

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Greetings from the Poor Man's Hawaii. Humidity is a way of life here. Remember, we're the state that boomed after the air conditioner was perfected. My advice to anyone who visits or stays for a long time is to wear loose-fitting, light clothes and make sure your car's a/c system is in good shape. If you're going to be outside for awhile, beach or not, wear a bit of sunscreen adn a hat and glasses don't hurt either. Other than that, just do what 15 million of us do and just deal with it. You'll never just 'get used to it'; I've lived here all my life and it still sucks. As for the drivers, my theory is that we get te rejects from all you Yankee states. Orlando drivers are to Floridians asNew York or L.A. drivers are to the rest of the country, namely they can't. Weave and bob is all they can do and at extrodinarily high speeds. And on I-4 in Orlando, they love to use the HOV lane for supersonic passes, so watch out for Audis, Bimmers, and Lexuses. They're the worst in Orlando. People make fun of grandpa in his Park Avenue for going 10 under the limit in the left lane. But at least wiht him, you know he's on the slow boat to China. These other crazies? Good luck. Also, watch out for RVs, the big fat hippos of the highways. No one knows how to drive those things. Appliance Direct is a large appliance (duh) wholesale chain with locations in central Florida and along the Space Coast. if the crazy guy is oriental and the woman is gangly-looking, then I know exactly what you're talking about. And all I have to say is..."Porcelain...wasy to clean and maintain. Smooth!" But come three months from now, you and everyone else will be wishing you were here in Florida. Beautiful sunsets, temperate air, mild breezes, and no snow. See, I can go to beach in December; can you? :D BTW: The Contemporary is beautiful hotel, IMO. I like it at least, especially how the monorail cuts through it. Also, if you or anyone else ever saunters through the Tampa Bay area at any time for whatever reason and want a quick tour or lunch, do let me know. I'd love to meet some fellow C&Gers if the chance arises. :) Enjoy your stay, Cmattson!
0

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
i like the way i ask a purely medically interesting question and bri just ignores it!!
0

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
1. Welcome to Florida, if you live here you get used to it. 2. Havent seen them, i live in Tampa. 3. The worst drivers in the world are here, St pete is number 1 city for pedestrian deaths and Tampa is number 2 for per capita collisions. Other than that, its great living here :) Edited by Brett
0

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
stace, I ain't skeert. Guys do not put deodorant anywhere near their balls. Like menthol, it would prolly burn the hell out of them!
0

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Sorry about the delay in getting back on here; I had the local watering hole tour last night; the "monkey nut" was fantastic (don't ask). Cool souvenier glass though...

Yes, the deoderant/balls comment was just an expression. I don't think I've ever tried it (or ever want to).. but it gets my point across: it's damn muggy down here. Today seems a bit better, however.

I'm afraid I'm stuck at the conference all day today -- they even have us booked for a little entertainment tonight -- some Hawaiian thing over at the Polynesian. Oh great, more liquor. My liver is going to need a get-a-way from this get-a-way.

I'm still having a blast. The Contemporary is very nice. I still remember parts of it when my parents took me here as a kid. Way cool. It's a software conference/convention -- materials a bit dry -- and it drags at time. It's still nice to look at a different set of walls than what my office affords me every other day.

I'm taking a break during "lunch". For those of you that don't know how this works, here's how it goes. Somebody calls my office and complains something doesn't work. The support people panic and it gets forwarded to me. I get to miss my @&$^#$ lunch for the third consecutive day fixing another stoopid (<- intentional) nuisance issue. I don't mind when it ACTUALLY IS something important. Unfortunately, people have different criteria for that status.

Last time around (they hold these baby's every 18 months), it was in La$ Vega$. Florida is a nice change of pace -- and I get to keep a little more money in my pocket. Judging the prices of things, and how they seem to like to gouge the tourists, it may actually come out to be pretty even. Oh well, if that's all I've got to complain about, I guess I'm doing pretty well for myself.

Take care everybody. Tomorrow's only goes a half day & I'm going to frolic in the sun. (and yes, that is JUST to rub it in for all the people that have to work tomorrow).

Lastly:

Porcelain...wasy to clean and maintain. Smooth

LOL! That's the one. Dorky as hell. I've never seen a commercial that bad. I've actually seen it twice--those two need therapy. Edited by cmattson
0

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Fly is probably more qualified to answer your questions, but I have one..
Guys really put deodorant under their balls???????????????

[post="1993"]<{POST_SNAPBACK}>[/post]


I've never heard of using deodorant, but Gold Bond is quite wonderful.
0

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
well, it was just one of those things i had noone to ask. sorta like the "urinal ettiquette" discussion i have with guy friends about once every 3 years :omfg:
0

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
speaking of which stace, i think that urinal ettiquette is very important too, here it is in a nutshell, the persons in the room dont exist, you zip after you park it and before you leave, shake once or twice thats fine, eyes on the wall ahead of you and quick rinse in the sink for games and show, wash thoroughly for work and dates, that good
0

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I don't think I've ever tried it...

[post="2443"]<{POST_SNAPBACK}>[/post]

I'm sure you'd remember if you had. Wouldn't be a fun experience. :lol:
0

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
well, Mute, while all of that sounds totally logical apparently you forgot one big item. The guy friends tell me that you must leave a urinal between you and the next guy, even two if there are enough. One guy friend will go into a stall before he'll take the available urinal between two.....pi....people - HA! you guys thought i was gonna say pissers, didn't ya!? :P
0

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
DAMN! I failed every single question on the test! :(
0

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Your content will need to be approved by a moderator

Guest
You are commenting as a guest. If you have an account, please sign in.
Reply to this topic...

×   You have pasted content with formatting.   Remove formatting

×   Your link has been automatically embedded.   Display as a link instead

×   Your previous content has been restored.   Clear editor

Sign in to follow this  
Followers 0