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ZL-1

Therapy/Therapists

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I've been wondering what's everyone's opinion about therapists/therapy... It's very hard for me to reveal myself to complete strangers, to appear vulnerable, but at the same time that's what makes therapy useful: someone who doesn't have an emotional connection to his/her client can 'kick butt' when needed and give you some 'candy' when you deserve a self-esteem boost.

So, what are everyone's thoughts about this?

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I've been wondering what's everyone's opinion about therapists/therapy... It's very hard for me to reveal myself to complete strangers, to appear vulnerable, but at the same time that's what makes therapy useful: someone who doesn't have an emotional connection to his/her client can 'kick butt' when needed and give you some 'candy' when you deserve a self-esteem boost.

So, what are everyone's thoughts about this?

I've been seeing one weekly since my breakup back in January. It helps, but you really need to develop a connection with the person. I didn't care for the first therapist I saw and I searched for another. I like the one I have now much better.

It helps, but you have to keep at it for a while. It's not going to be 5 trips and you're done.

Full disclosure: I refuse to take meds. I feel that they simply mask the underlying problem. Unless there is something chemically wrong, there is nothing meds can do that other non-medical methods can't.

I'd be happy to discuss any of this further in PM.

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I've been wondering what's everyone's opinion about therapists/therapy... It's very hard for me to reveal myself to complete strangers, to appear vulnerable, but at the same time that's what makes therapy useful: someone who doesn't have an emotional connection to his/her client can 'kick butt' when needed and give you some 'candy' when you deserve a self-esteem boost.

So, what are everyone's thoughts about this?

They are all quacks! Tell me your problems, ZL-1, I'll give your a cure for problems for half the price. After all I am German, we have all the answers! :smilewide:

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I think they are okay if you have a problem you absolutely cannot solve, or if you are feeling anxiety. They are also great about working with people who have just learned they are HIV poz and adjust to that tragedy, or deaths in the family, and other big changes that are unsettling.

It's hard for me to reveal much about myself and even harder for me to trust anyone, so for me, it would not be easy for me to open up to anyone. If thats what you choose though, I hope it works out for you. They do help some people.

Edited by K.C.
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Therapists are excellent if you know what you want out of it.

For example:

DO NOT go to anyone who says they're a psychoanalyst or something of that manner, because usually they are not required to even have a background in the fields of psychology or medicine.

Psychiatrists are usually medically minded, meaning their education will be something akin to a medical doctor. That means he/she will most likely evaluate you and then try to CORRECT whatever ails you through medication. It's simply because that's the view they are taught and that's what they specialize in. They consider the brain like any other part of the body; and exercise in chemistry.

Psychologists are behavior people. A true psychologist will evaluate you, then try to correct whatever ails you through some sort of behavior adjustment or supplement (Relaxation techniques, positive reinforcement, self evaluation, etc.) and then will only reccommend meds in the most severe situations. If meds are reccommended, you'll have to see a regular doctor for the prescription as Psychologists are not yet allowed by law to physically prescribe meds. (They will be soon though)

Speaking from personal experience, I would highly reccommend talking to someone if you think you need to. It isn't a sign of weakness or that you're 'crazy' as some would have you believe (I struggled with this a lot my first time going) It's very rare that you get someone who is a 'bad' therapist. I would advise being completely honest, as the person will have a hard time helping you if you are not. Just look at it like I did: This is how I feel, for better or for worse and if this person doesn't like it, then they don't have to associate with me." It is a very hard thing to open yourself up like that. I'm especially mistrusting and hard to get to know (Most of you know this from my posts here) BUT there comes a point where you realize that the thoughts running through your head are not at all healthy and need to surface some other way besides anger or grief (In my case)

I would NOT, however suggest medication of any sort unless you absolutely need it. I did the meds thing for a while and it severly affected my life in a negative way. I went from feeling these intense emotions to not really feeling anything UNTIL I would reach a certain threshold. Then all of that emotion (Usually anger) would flood me at once. It had other side effects as well, I pretty much flunked out of school because I couldn't focus on $h!, I gained a lot of weight, I was tired A LOT, I couldn't drink more than 1 or 2 beers before being at the point of passing out, etc.

Edited by FUTURE_OF_GM
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Thanks for the offer PCS :P

Also, thanks to everyone else for the comments! I wholly agree with FOG and Oldsmoboi about medication: Unless someone convinces me there's something wrong with my brain chemistry, I'll keep thinking that any chemical substances that interfere with one's brain are just like putting a veil in front of issues, without those issues getting solved.

It's hard work looking inside, but extremely rewarding at the same time!

@ PCS (because I know you'll ask) - I'd say it's like looking at your own Gordian Knot and learning how to cut it instead of untying it. :AH-HA_wink:

For those of you that do not know the Gordian Knot story/legend, here's a Wikipedia linkypoo.

EDIT @ fly: your reply made me lol. Thanks! :)

Edited by ZL-1
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Thanks for the offer PCS :P

Also, thanks to everyone else for the comments! I wholly agree with FOG and Oldsmoboi about medication: Unless someone convinces me there's something wrong with my brain chemistry, I'll keep thinking that any chemical substances that interfere with one's brain are just like putting a veil in front of issues, without those issues getting solved.

It's hard work looking inside, but extremely rewarding at the same time!

@ PCS (because I know you'll ask) - I'd say it's like looking at your own Gordian Knot and learning how to cut it instead of untying it. :AH-HA_wink:

For those of you that do not know the Gordian Knot story/legend, here's a Wikipedia linkypoo.

EDIT @ fly: your reply made me lol. Thanks! :)

Alexander the Great and I think alike! :scratchchin:

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I've been wondering what's everyone's opinion about therapists/therapy... It's very hard for me to reveal myself to complete strangers, to appear vulnerable, but at the same time that's what makes therapy useful: someone who doesn't have an emotional connection to his/her client can 'kick butt' when needed and give you some 'candy' when you deserve a self-esteem boost.

So, what are everyone's thoughts about this?

I hate therapists, psychologists, and psychiatrists. I didn't make that strong enough, hold on:

HATE

There you go.

For me, they've all been full of bull$h!. I've been to several, none have helped. Wanna know what helped? Good friends.

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I hate therapists, psychologists, and psychiatrists. I didn't make that strong enough, hold on:

HATE

There you go.

For me, they've all been full of bull$h!. I've been to several, none have helped. Wanna know what helped? Good friends.

it was just a question :smilewide:

i've always been smart enough to favour quality in place of quantity regarding my friendships, and i do have a wonderful group of friends. however, they have an emotional attachment and right now i need some detachment so i can look at things with a little less emotion. more analitically.

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I could give some opinon-based, philosophically-driven response, but I've never seen a therapist so it would be of questionable value.

I've been in plenty of situations that might call for this kind of "intervention", but I've always just dealt with it on my own. I think that has turned me into a survivor.

"that which doesn't kill you..."

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Meditation Helps. Always ask yourself and the supernatural for your own troubles. :P
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I hate therapists, psychologists, and psychiatrists. I didn't make that strong enough, hold on:

HATE

There you go.

For me, they've all been full of bull$h!. I've been to several, none have helped. Wanna know what helped? Good friends.

Well, finding one that cares, helps. :P
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Well, finding one that cares, helps. :P

How did that person care for/about you? :scratchchin:

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How did that person care for/about you? :scratchchin:

Not necessarily care for myself, per se, but actually care about what he was doing. He genuinely wanted to help out, unlike some therapists.
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Sean Connery Spoof from SNL

Connery: "Alex, I'll take The Rapists for $1,000 please!"

Alex: "THATS THERAPISTS!!!!!!"

:lol:

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Sean Connery Spoof from SNL

Connery: "Alex, I'll take The Rapists for $1,000 please!"

Alex: "THATS THERAPISTS!!!!!!"

:lol:

How about Famous Titties for $400?

I agree with you BV, if someone works for the people along with need to make money, one should not have problems seeing that The-rapist.

The way I look at it, I think therapists just build their model of you based on their perception of you and what answers you provide them. The only person who can give unbiased perception of yourself is you. That is how it is going to give the best results. The first step is to recognize you have/ may have problems. If you have desire to correct, you definitely will improve yourself.

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everyone walking the face of the earth could use it from time to time.

Thank you...and a much better post than the one immediately above it...sorry, Fly, like you're exempt and I only mean that "globally" since I don't know you?

There is nothing to be ashamed about in seeking any kind of help for physical or psychological conditions. The important thing is that you get help from professionals who are good at what they do. I don't know how one would line up a good therapist, per se. It might be weird to get a referral from a friend but perhaps you can get a referral from a university's counseling department or a member of the clergy with whom you feel comfortable. And, yes, as stated above, the right credentials and amount of experience are important...and you will need a baseline for your area to gauge that from. (And don't listen to PCS, Germans are only good at engineering and other RIGID things, thus lacking completely in people skills. :lol: )

Good friends are super important. My friends are my therapists in a way and, God, am I ever their therapist. I say to myself: this is what I should have done so I could charge for it! The problem is that there are different gradations of friends and some are too superficial while others are deeper.

And remember, there are also TERAPISTS, without an h, according to Dr. Ruth Westheimer. I love that lady!

Edited by trinacriabob
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The way I look at it, I think therapists just build their model of you based on their perception of you and what answers you provide them. The only person who can give unbiased perception of yourself is you. That is how it is going to give the best results. The first step is to recognize you have/ may have problems. If you have desire to correct, you definitely will improve yourself.

Those are my thoughts exactly. Therapists are good at giving you hints and the occasional nudge so that you think about the information they send your way and you decide what to do: they're like a lever you use to make it easier to lift a large object. The process is actually very interesting if you look at it from the self-improvement perspective!

@ bob - Mine's a good one. When I saw she can curse more than I can, I knew I am in good hands :lol:

@ camino - I've done a lot of DIY wrk myself, but (in my case) I needed a non-emotionally-involved perspective. As I wrote above, it's like using a lever to lift a large object.

Edited by ZL-1
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Those are my thoughts exactly. Therapists are good at giving you hints and the occasional nudge so that you think about the information they send your way and you decide what to do: they're like a lever you use to make it easier to lift a large object. The process is actually very interesting if you look at it from the self-improvement perspective!

I agree, it should be always looked in self-improvement perspective, otherwise, you depend on others to help yourself help you.

Do you think it is the consultants in us thinking this way? :P

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There is nothing to be ashamed about in seeking any kind of help for physical or psychological conditions.

Sure there isn't! :rolleyes: I have to wonder about a man who can't solve his own everyday problems without having to talk to some shrink. :scratchchin:

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Those are my thoughts exactly. Therapists are good at giving you hints and the occasional nudge so that you think about the information they send your way and you decide what to do: they're like a lever you use to make it easier to lift a large object. The process is actually very interesting if you look at it from the self-improvement perspective!

The concept of a "model" per smallchevy is pretty good and pretty accurate, after all, they study patterns in their training and see patterns in practice. That's why, when you listen to a talk show, the invited psychologist or psychotherapists explains things in broader generalities based on what they have studied and encountered. Plus, you (the patient or client) is who needs to put things into practice.
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